Imagine that, you had to choose which path you want to take to reach a destination. So, you thought hard while trying to listen to your heart and seeking out advises.
Finally, you came to a conclusion and thus, you chose a path.
You are proud of your decision because it's the path you wanted.
You start walking.
After quite a long while, fear creeps in and doubts comes. The path ahead seems dark and tiring. You start to wonder if you made a wrong decision. Did you choose the wrong path? Right now, everything just feels so wrong.
You are scared.
What if this path wasn't for you?
What if it's too hard?
But you made this decision, why change it?
And suddenly you realize, you don't even really know what you want anymore.
You are wondering if you should run back to the beginning and then, decide from the very beginning. Choose a whole new path, an easier path.
But if you do that, you waste time and perhaps money.
You feel unprepared for what's ahead that path. You feel scared and probably tired.
Maybe, you are still weary from the battles you have just finished.
The wounds are still fresh and you feel that maybe, you can't fight right now.
What do you want to do now?
Or continue marching on since you decided on this in the first place?
Well, this is how I feel right now.
Everything feels hard and tiring. I feel like I want to turn back but should I? And if I do, what for?
I wish I had clarity.
In the past, when I took A-levels, I had clarity. I knew that I wanted this and never for a moment, did I want to run away.
But this time, it's a different story.
I would probably continue marching on because money has been spent and hopefully, the path wouldn't feel so dark and tiring as I continue on.