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Growing up.

This year, I will be turning 21 years old.
Legally, it means that I am an adult now.
A real adult that the law can prosecute if I did any crime.

But turning 21 scares me.
I know that it's just a number but it isn't just a number to me.

I will be an adult soon.
And I guess, I don't want to grow up.

I see friends of the same age as me having jobs, graduated or working and studying at the same time. 
I feel like they are in a whole different universe from me.
I feel like I am not there yet and I don't want to be there.

Yes, I am currently studying but I do have loads of fun.
I read, write and go on the internet alot.
I enjoy getting so involve in a story that nothing else matters and reality melts away.
I enjoy ranting on the internet about stupid silly things.
I enjoy watching the same stupid videos on the internet that I have watched a million times.
I enjoy being in my own head.

I don't want to grow up.
I don't want to have responsibilities.
I just want to let loose and have fun.

I guess, I am afraid that growing up means that the fun dies, the curiosity stops and the ability to see the wonder or beauty in things disappear.
And I don't want that to happen.
Because that will mean killing me.
And being dead would be better than me being a completely dull strict person.

That is why I don't want to grow up.


Happy "Sam" said…

All people also will growing up.
That is life ~

New challager come !!
New things facing !!
All new new !!

How is other people ?
They are not you. ^_^
Enjoy what is you.
wait the challager come !!
Set the goal you want !!
That I love it !!

When I die ?
Scard to die ?
Don't worry !!

For me,
What can i do now,
just enjoy what i got(apprience),
just help people that need,
Family, friends and other.

Nothings will regret if I tomorrow die ~

Don't worry ~
miss.yuuka said…
I turned 23 recently. I'm now working full-time. Back in university, I used to work part-time and study full-time. Just for pocket money.

But I did have fun, I watched anime, I read books, I hung out with friends. University life was the best years of my life.

My friends and I would love to go back to those days when we didn't have to think about responsibilities, loans, interviews, etc. But we know that we'd have to face the fact that we've graduated. We've grown old.

Time we can't wind back, but the time we have, we try to make the best of it and keep in touch. I still hang out with them when I could (and talk about books and mundane, funny things).

I wish you all the best. Enjoy it, live for the moment. You won't get it back. Don't stress about things that you don't have to stress about. =)
文儀 said…
we changed without ourselves even knowing it. It is the real changes, while we don't even notice. Those we notice is the one we deliberately asked for to change.

Good or bad I want to believe that the core thing about us, the one that strictly define who we are, could never change easily.

And curiosity not necessary will gone off when we grow older. I like to say attitude is the more superior thing in my list rather than skill and experience.

With good attitude you could get all the others, just a matter of time.

And writers are always going to fee curious about mostly everything.

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